Love on My Time

Photo credit: D. Sharon Pruitt

Love is not one-size fits all. It doesn’t operate on a universal timetable. So why are we expected to find the person we want to spend our life with by the time we’re 22? At no time is this expectation more apparent than around Valentine’s Day. With chocolate, teddy bears, conversation hearts, and questions about your dating status coming out of the woodwork.

Jane Austen Dating

Though my iPhone says it’s 2012, it sure feels like I’m living in a Jane Austen novel from the questions I get about my personal life, especially in February:

“Not married? Don’t you want to get married?”

I never tell them that marriage actually is not a goal of mine. I’m too afraid they’ll drop dead right then and there.

“No boyfriend! But you’re so pretty. What’s wrong with you?”

Never does it occur to them that something is wrong with the gentlemen callers, as Tennessee Williams once dubbed them.

“You know you aren’t getting any younger. Better get a fella before they’re all gone!”

I’m not?! Gee and here I thought I was pulling a Benjamin Button this whole time. Thanks for the update.

Love on My Time

In this day and age when women are theoretically equal (I do not call earning 80 cents on the dollar equal but that’s a discussion for another day), why is it still so shocking for a woman in her 20′s to be unmarried without everyone assuming that she has some hideous defect? I never hear my guy friends of the same age being grilled in a similar fashion.

I do not mean this piece to be an embittered diatribe against all things love, nor do I mean to imply that I am against love. Quite the contrary. But I want love on my terms and my timetable. The idea that we should have found love by a certain randomly assigned point in our lives is what I believe pushes so many to rush into marriage and consequently causes them to later get a divorce.

Your Choice

You should never marry someone just because you dislike like being alone or because you’re with them at the age when you think you should be married. You have to wait until you are ready. True, there is the chance that you never meet that “perfect” person. But you have to ask yourself this question:

Would you rather wait for something amazing or settle for something mediocre?

Me?

I don’t settle.

I only do amazing.

Chat This Week: u30′s in the Workplace

The week is flying by – can you believe that tomorrow is Thursday and we have another #u30pro chat? Believe it, because it’s happening. While Scotty is out and Dave is climbing some mountain (Yes, I did refer to Mt. Kilamanjaro as “some mountain”) we will have a special guest in the hot seat for…

Networking is Like Dating: Wine and Dine Them

One of my mentors, Cynthia D’Amour, always says that networking is like dating: You have to wine and dine them. Don’t Talk Shop It’s easy to approach networking events as always being on or talking shop. As a professional event, the natural direction of the brain is to talk and impress with professional prowess and…

4 Kinds of Job Announcements.

job

Job announcements. They are extremely popular and everyone feels entitled to make them. It’s often someone justifying a reason to tell the whole world without considering it “bragging.” There are a few kinds of “announcements” nonetheless even though any kind of is irrelevant. Here are some types. THE “NEW COLLEGE GRAD” ANNOUNCEMENT “I just accepted…

Too High, Too Low, Too Gen Y?

The workplace is changing. It’s not just about the type of personality that is in an office, or corporate culture. It’s that superficial first impression that comes when meeting a colleague, potential or current client for the first time. The image presented is one that should convey the type of work, person and integrity level…

Four Words That Define Who We Are

band

What do you do? I dread this question. Unfortunately, this question is what defines us in social situations. At networking events. When you’re introduced to your new sister in law. Or when you meet new parents at your son’s first Tuesday evening swim class of the summer. What do you do? Four simple words with…

#u30pro TONIGHT: Evolving Relationships and Making Time for Friends

**This post was written by Valerie Simon. If you don’t know Valerie, you should – you can follow her on Twitter @valeriesimon. I recently found out that my former college roommate, sorority sister, and dear friend has Cancer.  It has spread to her liver as well as two places in her bones. As I mentioned…

Rethinking The Resume

photo credit: Leo Reynolds

I’ve seen quite a few stories about people searching (and getting) jobs in innovative ways over the past few years. Lately, the news has focused on resumes instead of the job searches themselves. To that end, Fast Company posted an article entitled “How It Works As A New College Grad”, and tackled the topic from…

When “Be Happy You Have a Job” Just Doesn’t Cut It

photo (1)

In the 4 years since I’ve graduated college, I haven’t had it too bad when it came to finding jobs. Reader’s Digest version of my post-collegiate resume: Went home to nanny for the summer; moved to Rochester, NY; pedaled pizza coupons (really…); and after two months of looking; landed a job at one of Rochester’s…

As an entry-level employee in THIS economy, do you always say yes?

Image by Pete Ashton

Some of the discussions on the u30pro Facebook page have me thinking lately: as an entry-level employee, do you always have to say yes? You’re at the bottom of the totem pole, you’re paying your dues, but sometimes it can feel like you’re all alone (even when you know deep down every else is working…